I Wish You Knew

63 Days to Rewire Your Brain & Relationships (Dr. Caroline Leaf)

In this episode, Dr. Caroline Leaf joins to discuss how the mind, not the brain, holds the power to reshape thoughts, relationships, and mental health. She shares groundbreaking insights on neuroplasticity, attachment styles, and her proven 63-day cycle for rewiring toxic patterns into healthier ones.
✨ Topics Covered ✨👉 Why the brain doesn’t think and how the mind drives change👉 The truth about neuroplasticity and breaking free from outdated mental health myths👉 How trauma and attachment wounds are first processed in the mind, then stored in the brain👉 Understanding the nonscious, subconscious, and conscious mind👉 The process of deconstruction and reconstruction for healing relationships👉 Why the 21-day myth is false and why real transformation takes 63 days👉 Daily practices to stop people pleasing, reset patterns, and reframe responses
Check out Dr. Caroline Leaf’s new book:Help In A Hurry: Simple Tips for Finding Peace When You're Overwhelmed, Anxious, or Stressed👉 https://store.drleaf.com/collections/all/products/help-in-a-hurry-simple-tips-for-finding-peace-when-youre-overwhelmed-anxious-or-stressed
If you enjoyed watching this episode, you might love 'Dr. Orion Taraban: Why Modern Men Are Failing at Intimacy'. Watch here: https://youtu.be/rYdzdGReDqg
Join this channel to get access to perks: https://www.youtube.com/@AttachmentAdam 
Work with Adam Lane Smith, The Attachment Specialist:
1- https://adamlanesmith.com/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 2- https://adamlanesmith.com/product/how-to-love-an-avoidant-man/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 3- https://adamlanesmith.com/product/the-attachment-bootcamp/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 4- https://adamlanesmith.com/work-with-me/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 5- https://adamlanesmith.com/attachment-repair/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 
Want to learn your attachment style, and sign up for Adam's weekly newsletter? Click the link below to receive your copy and sign up now.https://adamlanesmith.com/newsletter-signup/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 
If you want to know your attachment style , take our free attachment quiz: https://adamlanesmith.com/attachment-assessment/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 
Connect with Adam on your second preferred platform:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentadam/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentbro X: https://twitter.com/adamlanesmith Threads: https://www.threads.com/@attachmentadam Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/AdamLaneSmith/ I Wish You Knew Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCh_uRUnpQwNZb_WG76TxTTw?sub_confirmation=1

What Disorganized Attachment Really Feels Like

What does it really feel like to live with disorganized attachment? In this episode, Adam welcomes Amy Moore, who shares her story of navigating survival mode, struggling with both avoidance and anxiety, and learning how to begin her healing journey.
Topics Covered:👉 Amy’s experience with disorganized attachment and “survival mode”👉 How attachment styles shift between avoidance (single) and anxiety (in relationships)👉 The role of parenting and how her daughter perceives her healing journey👉 Why emotional safety and oxytocin bonding are critical in relationships👉 How trauma from infancy and childhood affects adult attachment patterns👉 The freeze response and how it’s often misinterpreted as indifference👉 Practical steps for repair: asking questions, sharing context, and creating safe communication👉 The importance of forgiveness, self-awareness, and building trust with 2–3 close connections
If you enjoyed watching this episode, you might love 'Dr. Orion Taraban: Why Modern Men Are Failing at Intimacy'. Watch here: https://youtu.be/rYdzdGReDqg
Join this channel to get access to perks: https://www.youtube.com/@AttachmentAdam 
Work with Adam Lane Smith, The Attachment Specialist:
1- https://adamlanesmith.com/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 2- https://adamlanesmith.com/product/how-to-love-an-avoidant-man/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 3- https://adamlanesmith.com/product/the-attachment-bootcamp/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 4- https://adamlanesmith.com/work-with-me/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 5- https://adamlanesmith.com/attachment-repair/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 
Want to learn your attachment style, and sign up for Adam's weekly newsletter? Click the link below to receive your copy and sign up now.https://adamlanesmith.com/newsletter-signup/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 
If you want to know your attachment style , take our free attachment quiz: https://adamlanesmith.com/attachment-assessment/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 
Connect with Adam on your second preferred platform:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentadam/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentbro X: https://twitter.com/adamlanesmith Threads: https://www.threads.com/@attachmentadam Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/AdamLaneSmith/ I Wish You Knew Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCh_uRUnpQwNZb_WG76TxTTw?sub_confirmation=1

Can MEN Really Find FREEDOM from Emotional Numbness and Disconnection

Can men really find freedom from emotional numbness and disconnection? This episode takes a deep look at the roots of emotional intimacy struggles and the path toward genuine healing and connection.
Topics Covered:👉 The hidden pain men carry across generations👉 Why men need purpose to step up and grow👉 Emotional intimacy gaps in relationships👉 Emotions as a language: mirroring, validation, empathy👉 The CEO & COO model for leading family life👉 How resentment and contempt destroy connection👉 The role of women in sparking masculine growth👉 Feminine energy as healing and grounding👉 The hero’s journey and proving manhood👉 Building vision, culture, and leadership at home
By facing emotional numbness head-on, men can build stronger connections and live more fulfilling lives. This episode offers tools and insight for anyone ready to take the first step toward emotional freedom.
If you enjoyed watching this episode, you might love '5 Harsh Truths About Marriage I Would Tell My Daughter. Watch here: https://youtu.be/lnZweecoi6k  
Join this channel to get access to perks: https://www.youtube.com/@AttachmentAdam 
Work with Adam Lane Smith, The Attachment Specialist:
1- https://adamlanesmith.com/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 2- https://adamlanesmith.com/product/how-to-love-an-avoidant-man/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 3- https://adamlanesmith.com/product/the-attachment-bootcamp/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 4- https://adamlanesmith.com/work-with-me/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 5- https://adamlanesmith.com/attachment-repair/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 
Want to learn your attachment style, and sign up for Adam's weekly newsletter? Click the link below to receive your copy and sign up now.https://adamlanesmith.com/newsletter-signup/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 
If you want to know your attachment style , take our free attachment quiz: https://adamlanesmith.com/attachment-assessment/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 
Connect with Adam on your second preferred platform:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentadam/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentbro X: https://twitter.com/adamlanesmith Threads: https://www.threads.com/@attachmentadam Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/AdamLaneSmith/ I Wish You Knew Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCh_uRUnpQwNZb_WG76TxTTw?sub_confirmation=1
Max Trombly:IG: https://www.instagram.com/maxtrombly/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@maxtromblyYoutube: https://www.youtube.com/@maxtrombly/featured
#emotionalintimacy#mensgrowth#relationshipgrowth

Dr. Orion Taraban: Why Modern Men Are Failing at Intimacy

Not everyone, especially modern men, should be in a relationship and Dr. Orion Taraban returns to explore exactly why.
In this video, Dr. Orion Taraban and Adam dive deep into the emotional wounds, subconscious needs, and hidden motivations that shape modern relationships. 
 Topics Covered👉 Why healing must come before entering a relationship👉 The evolving nature of needs and desires in long-term relationships👉 How relationships mirror addiction and recovery cycles👉 The psychology behind trauma bonding and emotional dependency👉 Why many people stay in bad relationships out of fear or familiarity👉 Transactional intimacy and the negotiation of emotional needs👉 The "crisis of disillusionment" after initial attraction fades👉 Relationship value and the sexual marketplace👉 Why people struggle to assess their own worth in relationships
If you enjoyed watching this episode, you might love '5 Harsh Truths About Marriage I Would Tell My Daughter. Watch here: https://youtu.be/lnZweecoi6k  
Join this channel to get access to perks: https://www.youtube.com/@AttachmentAdam 
Work with Adam Lane Smith, The Attachment Specialist:
1- https://adamlanesmith.com/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 2- https://adamlanesmith.com/product/how-to-love-an-avoidant-man/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 3- https://adamlanesmith.com/product/the-attachment-bootcamp/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 4- https://adamlanesmith.com/work-with-me/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 5- https://adamlanesmith.com/attachment-repair/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 
Want to learn your attachment style, and sign up for Adam's weekly newsletter? Click the link below to receive your copy and sign up now.https://adamlanesmith.com/newsletter-signup/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 
If you want to know your attachment style , take our free attachment quiz: https://adamlanesmith.com/attachment-assessment/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 
Connect with Adam on your second preferred platform:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentadam/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentbro X: https://twitter.com/adamlanesmith Threads: https://www.threads.com/@attachmentadam Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/AdamLaneSmith/ I Wish You Knew Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCh_uRUnpQwNZb_WG76TxTTw?sub_confirmation=1
Follow Dr. Orion Taraban:Youtube:  @psychacks  Website: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/psyc.hacks/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/people/PsycHacks/100090053889622/ Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@oriontaraban       Twitter /X: https://twitter.com/oriontaraban LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/orion-taraban-070b45168/
#modernmen #relationships #selfawareness

Why He Can’t Say “I Love You” (Even If He Feels It)

This episode explores why some men struggle to say “I love you” even when they truly feel it. It is not always about a lack of love. 
It is often about emotional wiring, past experiences, and how they process vulnerability. By understanding these deeper reasons, you can navigate the silence with more clarity and compassion.
 Topics Covered: 👉 Emotional barriers that block verbal expressions of love👉 How upbringing and past relationships shape communication patterns👉 The role of attachment styles in expressing affection👉 Why actions sometimes speak louder than words for certain men👉 Healthy ways to navigate and respond when “I love you” is hard to say
If you enjoyed watching this episode, you might love '5 Harsh Truths About Marriage I Would Tell My Daughter. Watch here: https://youtu.be/lnZweecoi6k  
Join this channel to get access to perks: https://www.youtube.com/@AttachmentAdam 
Work with Adam Lane Smith, The Attachment Specialist:
1- https://adamlanesmith.com/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 2- https://adamlanesmith.com/product/how-to-love-an-avoidant-man/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 3- https://adamlanesmith.com/product/the-attachment-bootcamp/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 4- https://adamlanesmith.com/work-with-me/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 5- https://adamlanesmith.com/attachment-repair/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 
Want to learn your attachment style, and sign up for Adam's weekly newsletter? Click the link below to receive your copy and sign up now.https://adamlanesmith.com/newsletter-signup/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 
If you want to know your attachment style , take our free attachment quiz: https://adamlanesmith.com/attachment-assessment/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 
Connect with Adam on your second preferred platform:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentadam/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentbro X: https://twitter.com/adamlanesmith Threads: https://www.threads.com/@attachmentadam Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/AdamLaneSmith/ I Wish You Knew Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCh_uRUnpQwNZb_WG76TxTTw?sub_confirmation=1

Modern Dating Is Exhausting For Women - Learn How To Finally Feel Loved

Quiet disorganized attachment can make modern women feel invisible—shutting down out of fear of being “too much,” even when all they want is to be seen and loved.
In this episode, Dawn Dubelbeis opens up about the impact of childhood trauma and how her attachment style shaped her adult relationships. Alongside Adam, they unpack the path of how to build connection from a place of safety, not survival.
Topics Covered 👉 How quiet disorganized attachment shows up in adult relationships👉 Why women with this attachment style often feel invisible or “too much”👉 The biological role of vasopressin and oxytocin in bonding👉 The shutdown response: why emotions go numb and conflict feels unsafe👉 The cost of not asking for help—and how to start👉 Using emotional check-ins and clarity to build connection👉 What secure men actually need from women (and why silence confuses them)👉 How to create an emotionally safe, sustainable relationship👉 Turning your nervous system from shutdown to connection👉 Making your life inhospitable to avoidant partners—and safe for the right ones
If you enjoyed watching this episode, you might love '5 Harsh Truths About Marriage I Would Tell My Daughter. Watch here: https://youtu.be/lnZweecoi6k  
Join this channel to get access to perks: https://www.youtube.com/@AttachmentAdam 
Work with Adam Lane Smith, The Attachment Specialist:
1- https://adamlanesmith.com/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 2- https://adamlanesmith.com/product/how-to-love-an-avoidant-man/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 3- https://adamlanesmith.com/product/the-attachment-bootcamp/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 4- https://adamlanesmith.com/work-with-me/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 5- https://adamlanesmith.com/attachment-repair/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 
Want to learn your attachment style, and sign up for Adam's weekly newsletter? Click the link below to receive your copy and sign up now.https://adamlanesmith.com/newsletter-signup/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 
If you want to know your attachment style , take our free attachment quiz: https://adamlanesmith.com/attachment-assessment/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social 
Connect with Adam on your second preferred platform:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentadam/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentbro X: https://twitter.com/adamlanesmith Threads: https://www.threads.com/@attachmentadam Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/AdamLaneSmith/ I Wish You Knew Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCh_uRUnpQwNZb_WG76TxTTw?sub_confirmation=1

The Attachment Style That’s Been Ignored for 80 Years

Attachment style plays a bigger role in your relationships than you think, especially when it’s the one no one talks about.
In this episode, Adam explore the long-ignored freeze attachment style, rooted in fearful-avoidant patterns. After surviving childhood trauma, narcissistic abuse, and three failed marriages, Corina shares how this attachment style shaped her life and how she’s learning to heal.
Topics Covered:👉 What the freeze attachment style looks like in real life👉 How fearful-avoidant attachment develops through trauma👉 Why some attachment styles cause emotional shutdown or mutism👉 How attachment style impacts communication and intimacy👉 Rebuilding relationships after narcissistic abuse👉 Parenting teens with different attachment needs👉 Tools for communicating with partners who shut down emotionally👉 Reframing your identity and rebuilding self-worth
If you enjoyed watching this episode, you might love 'Why She Doesn’t Want You (Even If She Loves You) '. Watch here:  https://youtu.be/aUMUEbwcVuo
Need more help with your attachment? Work with Adam: www.adamlanesmith.com 
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Follow the “I Wish You Knew” Podcast:--------------------------------------------------Website:    https://iwishyouknew.show/   Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theiwishyouknewpodcast/  Tiktok:        https://www.tiktok.com/@iwishyouknewshow   Snapchat:  https://www.snapchat.com/iwishyouknewpod   Twitter /X:  https://twitter.com/iwishyouknewpod  Spotify:      https://open.spotify.com/show/4Ncc0MBgm04xTIQ5ByiCGI  Apple:        https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/i-wish-you-knew/id1713427809  
-------------------------------------------------Follow Adam Lane Smith:--------------------------------------------------Website: https://adamlanesmith.com/  Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCBO093GsMmnA9tb8lZPhbgg     Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentadam/  Twitter /X: https://x.com/AdamLaneSmith  Threads:   https://www.threads.net/@attachmentadam  Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentbro 
The next episode drops Thursday :)See you there.

What Makes an Avoidant Man Feel Safe Enough to Stay

What does it take for an Avoidant Man to finally feel safe enough to stay in love? 
In this episode, Kimmi returns to share his journey from emotional shutdown to engagement. Once known as “Kimmi the Avoidant,” he opens up about what helped him finally connect, feel secure, and build lasting love. 
Topics Covered: 👉 How avoidant attachment distorts emotional connection👉 Why emotional safety—not pressure—creates commitment👉 The surprising impact of oxytocin, magnesium, and sleep👉 How routines and rituals help avoidant men feel secure👉 The “emotional baby” stage and how to move through it👉 Avoidant men’s biggest fear: dying alone and unremembered👉 How to spot emotional bids and respond like a secure partner👉 The CEO analogy for leading your relationship well👉 How to continuously grow closer in long-term love
If you enjoyed watching this episode, you might love 'Why She Doesn’t Want You (Even If She Loves You) '. Watch here:  https://youtu.be/aUMUEbwcVuo
Need more help with your attachment? Work with Adam: www.adamlanesmith.com 
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Follow the “I Wish You Knew” Podcast:--------------------------------------------------Website:    https://iwishyouknew.show/   Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theiwishyouknewpodcast/  Tiktok:        https://www.tiktok.com/@iwishyouknewshow   Snapchat:  https://www.snapchat.com/iwishyouknewpod   Twitter /X:  https://twitter.com/iwishyouknewpod  Spotify:      https://open.spotify.com/show/4Ncc0MBgm04xTIQ5ByiCGI  Apple:        https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/i-wish-you-knew/id1713427809  
-------------------------------------------------Follow Adam Lane Smith:--------------------------------------------------Website: https://adamlanesmith.com/  Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCBO093GsMmnA9tb8lZPhbgg     Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentadam/  Twitter /X: https://x.com/AdamLaneSmith  Threads:   https://www.threads.net/@attachmentadam  Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentbro 
The next episode drops Thursday :)See you there.

Why Avoidant Men Can’t Love You (Until This Happens)

Avoidant men aren’t emotionally distant by choice. Their detachment is often a survival response wired deep into the brain.
In this episode, Adam breaks down how avoidant men develop this style of relating, why avoidant men often carry it into adulthood, and most importantly how to help avoidant men heal for good.
Topics covered:👉 The brain science behind avoidant men and emotional shutdown👉 Why avoidant men experience burnout, disconnection, and chronic stress👉 The role of vasopressin bonding in helping avoidant men build trust👉 Why securely attached partners often trigger avoidant men👉 How avoidant men can rewire their brains through real world emotional experiences👉 The shame core driving avoidant men since childhood👉 Step by step strategies to help avoidant men build emotional safety👉 How avoidant men struggle with intimacy, relationships, and legacy👉 What partners of avoidant men need to understand👉 Tools, supplements, and lifestyle shifts that support healing for avoidant men
If you enjoyed watching this episode, you might love 'Why She Doesn’t Want You (Even If She Loves You) '. Watch here:  https://youtu.be/aUMUEbwcVuo
Need more help with your attachment? Work with Adam: www.adamlanesmith.com 
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Follow the “I Wish You Knew” Podcast:--------------------------------------------------Website:    https://iwishyouknew.show/   Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theiwishyouknewpodcast/  Tiktok:        https://www.tiktok.com/@iwishyouknewshow   Snapchat:  https://www.snapchat.com/iwishyouknewpod   Twitter /X:  https://twitter.com/iwishyouknewpod  Spotify:      https://open.spotify.com/show/4Ncc0MBgm04xTIQ5ByiCGI  Apple:        https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/i-wish-you-knew/id1713427809  
-------------------------------------------------Follow Adam Lane Smith:--------------------------------------------------Website: https://adamlanesmith.com/  Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCBO093GsMmnA9tb8lZPhbgg     Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentadam/  Twitter /X: https://x.com/AdamLaneSmith  Threads:   https://www.threads.net/@attachmentadam  Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentbro 
The next episode drops Thursday :)See you there.

Her Unbelievable Plan to Make an Avoidant Man Say ‘I Do’!

In this episode, Andrey shares how he went from emotionally avoidant to fully committed in marriage. He breaks down the exact values, mindset shifts, and moments that made him stay. 
Adam and Andrey explore how real love forms not through perfection, but through shared vision and integrity. This is a blueprint for building lasting connection with an avoidant man.
Topics Covered:👉 What makes an avoidant man choose commitment👉 How to build lasting love with an avoidant man👉 The values that made her “the one”👉 Why a woman’s boundaries increase attraction👉 How she helped him cross the dopamine crash👉 What avoidant men secretly need to trust👉 The power of shared vision, timelines, and direction👉 Why self-abandonment ruins real connection
If you enjoyed watching this episode, you might love 'Why She Doesn’t Want You (Even If She Loves You) '. Watch here:  https://youtu.be/aUMUEbwcVuo
Need more help with your attachment? Work with Adam: www.adamlanesmith.com 
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Follow the “I Wish You Knew” Podcast:--------------------------------------------------Website:    https://iwishyouknew.show/   Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theiwishyouknewpodcast/  Tiktok:        https://www.tiktok.com/@iwishyouknewshow   Snapchat:  https://www.snapchat.com/iwishyouknewpod   Twitter /X:  https://twitter.com/iwishyouknewpod  Spotify:      https://open.spotify.com/show/4Ncc0MBgm04xTIQ5ByiCGI  Apple:        https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/i-wish-you-knew/id1713427809  
-------------------------------------------------Follow Adam Lane Smith:--------------------------------------------------Website: https://adamlanesmith.com/  Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCBO093GsMmnA9tb8lZPhbgg     Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentadam/  Twitter /X: https://x.com/AdamLaneSmith  Threads:   https://www.threads.net/@attachmentadam  Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentbro 
The next episode drops Thursday :)See you there.